So this evening I had the joyous pleasure of driving my son upstate to meet his step-mom and brother for the weekend. As we are waiting for them to arrive it suddenly starts raining like crazy. I mean, drenching rain in 2 mins. So we end up sitting in the truck laughing and talking. I love talking to my kids, they teach me so much. The conversation went EXACTLY like this: (If you are offended by talking about the size of God’s penis, please…keep reading and leave me a comment talking how sacrilegious I am)
(PS. this is the same boy that thought there was two Jennings…see previous post)
Xan: I used to be scared to walk in the rain, my friend told me one time that it was God peeing.
Me: Uh…what? (yep, I was speechless..and curious all at the same time)
Xan: But then I had a rational thought.
Me: You aren’t rational..
Xan: No, but I can have a thought.
Me: Ok, what is your rational thought?
Xan: Ok…picture it..well, don’t picture it…but you know. When a guy pees it’s usually in a straight line right?
Me: For argument’s sake, mostly.
Xan: So see, It couldn’t be God’s pee because he couldn’t have a straight line of pee and rain everywhere.
Me: *thinking*…Ok, would you say it’s safe to say that God is well endowed?
Xan: Uhm, huh?
Me: *giggling* Does God have a large penis?
Xan: I DON’T KNOW ITS NEVER DEPICTED (yes, he uses big words) but, ok, for this conversation…yes.
Me:Ok, when you are done peeing…what do you do?
Xan: uhmm flush?
Me: No, shake?
Xan: *uncontrollable laughter* yes
Me: Here Look:
(Thunderstorm we were in)
Me: Now, doesn’t that look like a “shake pattern”
Xan: I am never walking in the rain again.
Talk to your chidden, be ridiculous, laugh uncontrollably.